Convergent with memoirs not of a diva
-- if certainly of no small ego
Ejaculations from the Charm Factory
But they are divas, well known; Sky locally, Carole perhaps more widely -- if poorly known for their true gifts. Both are pioneers of the erotic: Pope a pervert before her time; Gilbert too queer for times of "respectable" gay smarm. Both, also, are familiar with the potential use, and abuse, of celebrity. Carole writes:
And they both have big egos. Big enough to be fragile, often injured. They abound with insecurities. No surprise I guess, much as I wish it weren't so fashionable these days, even obligatory, to bare them. Carole herself wearied of it, saying late on: "I'm so over me, I don't want to write about me. That me was so self-obsessed." If, like Sky, with talents worthy of obsession.
But enough about them (for the moment). Let's talk about me.
I'm no diva. No smashing presence. I'm an unassuming person of (as I once said, explaining my sanguine acceptance of relative poverty) "modest tastes and no fashion sense." But I do have an ego.
Michael was my boyfriend then, Paul Pearce a good friend for years. I recall the same scene if not in that setting, at a party, not the Y. (Well, that's vagrant memory for you. Or maybe Paul thought the line worth playing more than once.)
So, I confess to no small ego. And gladly. I like big egos. They let me know someone's there. And that they know it. True ego bestows an awareness crucial to civil life: I'm myself, in the world -- but the world is not all about me. Those who go on in raging self- obsession, well... they're not big. Just big bores.
Sky and Carole do go on. But not to boredom. They know the world is about lives beyond their own. Both go on, and on, about lots of them.
Though not a diva, I did keep a diary. More or less: journals at first, letters to friends later, copies kept since the early 1980s. And I've turned them to, if not quite autobiography, then certainly memoir. And big: Promiscuous Affections: A Life in The Bar, 1969-2000. It's online, many links to it in the pages here, including one right at the end.
Sky and Carole's books caught my interest for covering much the same moment in time. (As Sky said, easing trepidation, "If this book has any value, it will be because of the important period of time onto which my life has trespassed.") Also, much the same Toronto turf. And, best of all, some of the same people. Few were famous, many wondrous; their times too, and the world we made together.
I wrote that memoir in large part to celebrate those people, those times, that world. The chance to go on celebrating was just too good to pass up.
Go to: Contents page
Links to specific chapters of Promiscuous Affections appear as relevant in the following pages of Diva Diaries. The one below, which also appears on those pages, links to its Introduction, leading to its Contents page -- where you'll find key people and events highlighted in bold.
This page: http://www.rbebout.com/divas/divas.htm
January 2001 / Last revised: June 1, 2003
Rick Bébout © 2001-2003 / firstname.lastname@example.org